🌙 My third Ramadan in Dubai, and the small things that finally made it feel like home

This year was my third Ramadan in Dubai, and the first one where I didn't cry at iftar on the very first day. My first Ramadan here, I sat alone in our flat in Al Nahda with dates and a samosa from the shop downstairs. Back home in Hyderabad the whole family would be at the table, my mother handing out dates, the haleem pot in the middle. Here it was me, my husband stuck in traffic on his way home, and the adhan from the mosque across the road. Dubai has everything, and the haleem in Karama and Deira is good, but it never tastes like my mother's. So last year I made her teach me over video call, step by step, and my first two attempts were a disaster. The third one was close enough that my husband went quiet for a minute, which is high praise from him. The smell of those spices in our kitchen did more for my homesickness than anything I bought outside. The thing that helped most was something my younger sister came up with for our family iftar calls. We set the phone up in the middle of the table fifteen minutes before iftar, on both sides. Nobody talks much, we just sit there together for the countdown, the dua, and the first date. For those few minutes it feels like I'm at my mother's table again, even with the screen in between. This year I also started a small potluck iftar on Fridays for women in our building who are here alone. Five or six of us, each bringing one dish from home, Kerala, Karachi, Hyderabad, and one lady from Lucknow. It turned into the best part of my week, and two of them are close friends of mine now. On the quiet nights I go for taraweeh at the big mosque in Al Qusais, which helps more than sitting at home scrolling. Pardes is lonely in Ramadan and I won't pretend it isn't, but it's also given me a quieter month than home would. Fewer guests, fewer weddings to attend, and more time for prayer and for myself. If you're in Dubai, tell me which area you're in and I'll share the places I've found for good haleem. And if you've found your own way to make Ramadan feel like home abroad, please share it here.

This is exactly why I've never really liked the idea of going abroad long term, whatever you're going to do in life is better done in India, close to your own family, through the good times and the bad ones together. If you really must go, go for a short visit, stay maybe fifteen days and come back. I've seen so many people over the years who end up feeling extremely lonely abroad, especially around festivals like this one.

Afreen, the video call part is true for me too. Last Ramadan I watched my mother lay out dates on a screen. She held the phone over the plate so I could see each one.